CU on the Rebound? In Search of Next Love

Hilary Love, Associate Director for Student Support & Case Management, recently left CU Boulder to find what she described as “anything but this circus.” Although only a few days have passed since her departure, rumors are already flying that CU is starting to play the field.

“It’s way too soon for this!” said Chris Miller, Senior Case Manager. “Her office chair’s still warm, her lateral file’s still filled with corn chips – how can CU possibly talk about moving on already?!”

In response to campus outrage, CU Boulder’s Division of Student Affairs released a statement explaining that the university is “currently reviewing the structure of Student Support & Case Management and will wait to fill Love’s position until SSCM’s new director is in place and has an opportunity to weigh in.”

While this statement may be technically accurate in that the Associate Director position has yet to post to CU’s job board, there have been several reports that the university has been putting out feelers to potential future Loves through such platforms as LinkedIn, HECMA, Ashley Madison, and Tinder. When asked for comment at a recent press conference, a Student Affairs representative turned bright red and mumbled something that sounded like, “supposed to be discreet,” before their mic was suddenly disconnected.